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Happy then pensive ...

The day started pretty alright. I actually woke up looking forward to what was ahead of me. After all, I get to play and play...that's when I'm most happy!

Some highlights:

1. 1 hr of solid play of handball during Principles Of Games lesson
2. Inter-class Floorball in the evening


The Sunshine Team. My handball team for POG.
We were a bunch of handball greenhorns but we played to the best of our abilities and came in 4th out of 4 teams! Haha

My class's floorball team.

Played well (as usual) and we qualified for another round of play-offs on Friday

My class. Finally a complete shot captured.

With us are our lecturers for POG - Mr Swarup and Mr Gurmit.

The adrenaline from all the play didn't really last long. All of a sudden after POG lesson, this wave of loneliness hit me. Class dimissed and my gal classmates left (2 of them only); the guys either went off as well or played soccer, BB etc. There and then, I didn't know where to go. I wanted to rest because of the ICG game in the evening but to head back to hall so early didn't seem 'exciting'. After fiddling with the floorball sticks (in bid to practice) for a short while, I left the MPH for the library.

My usual haunt in NIE is the library where I read my papers and chill out by myself. But today, horror of all horrors, it was packed and my Straits Times was nowhere to be found. There was no seat for me as well. Decided to just leave for hall. So I did.

I went back to school at ard 7 plus for the ICG floorball. Unlike previous games, I didn't feel all that excited or happy. My classmate asked why I appeared so grouchy...I replied saying its because I was sleepy (which = angry/grouchy). On hindsight, I wasn't angry! I just didn't know how else to reply.

Played the game; we qualified for next round. Happy yes, but somehow there's something missing. I just wanted to leave the crowd and be able to just talk to someone! JUST TALK! So i called my 'husband'-Joani and yeah...went over to her hall after I showered.

She cooked me instant noodles with cabbage, and mushroom! Yummy! And we proceeded to have a really intriguing conversation for almost 1 and a half hours. We both realised that we were in our 'emo' state today! Both felt a sudden pang of loneliness today and very very pensive. We could not point our fingers to a specific cause. We just talked and talked...

Somewhere in our conversation, I realised in my 3 months here in NIE, I am still feeling my place around in my class especially. The adjustment to just having only 2 female classmates in a class of 28 is still ongoing. I so want more of the female factor, where I can enjoy some cool girlie's chill out time now and then. I feel so weird when I end up being the only gal around for ICGs or even hang out time with classmates. There have been moments where I just felt so out of place (being the only rose amongst the thorns! :) ) and I wished at that moment, I had my female compatriots with me!

I have another year plus plus with this class and maybe, just maybe, I will find a few close confidante amongst my classmates whom I can journey with here in NIE and beyond.

I don't even know if what I'm writing sounds coherent..haha sounds like I'm rambling!

Oh well...writing is most therapeutic when I don't have to bother if it makes sense. Just my feelings, me and myself.

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